Love is a complicated thing, ya feel me? Although you figure out more and more about love as you experience it with other people, and figure out what you will and what you won’t put up with from a partner, it never really gets any easier.
Our first real relationships are usually quite tumultuous. You’re young, naïve, optimistic and not always realistic. You believe that this person is going to be the last person you’ll ever be with even though it’s statistically highly unlikely. Young love is fraught with problems because there’s a good chance that you’re not done growing emotionally yet. You may not know exactly who you are or what you want out of life, so it’s probable that you and your partner will grow apart.
And when you two inevitably have problems, there’s likely going to be a lot of back and forth rather than a clean, civil break. Emotional outburts, social media stalking, hand-written letters gushing with proclamations and promises are pretty common between young couples.
In 1998, a young woman named Brittany wrote a letter to her former boyfriend Herbert, and it was a clear example of the issues that come from young love gone wrong. Such letters are often kept as mementos in an old desk or other such furniture. But this particular letter was recently found stuffed inside a J.J. Fadd album that was purchased at a thrift store. The former owner of the album and how this letter became housed in it is unknown.
The five-page letter from Brittany to Herbert is fantastic on so many levels, and the young lady is commendable for standing up for herself even though she is tempted to recommit to her boyfriend. Brittany, who may have been writing the letter from a youth correctional center (Jetson Correctional Center for Youth), stated that even though she still cares for Herb, she’s not going to be with him because he makes bad life choices and he cheated on her with her own sister.
The transcribed letter is here with Brittany’s spelling in tact:
To: Herbert
Heart: Brittany
Time: 8:30 p.m.
Date: March 12, 1998
Place: J.C.C.Y.
Reason: I’m writing back!
Request: W/B/N!
Mood: I don’t know….
Motto: Stay sweet & keep ya head up
Song: “I’ll be missing you”
By: 112/Faith Evans/Puff Daddy
Song: “I Will Always (Heart) You”
By: Whitney Houston
Herb, well, hey what’s up?!?
I just got your letter…. Well, I don’t really know what to tell you about what you said. There’s no such thing as 7 yrs. bad luck b/c that’s superstician… If you believe in Jesus, you wouldn’t think like that. (That’s my opinion)
Anyway, well I can admit I do miss you, but I was going to go on with my life (like I planned). It hurt very much deep inside, but I realized I can’t be in a relationship with someone who’s always gonna cheat on me and not trust me! And who is always getting in trouble. I already made up my mind and I’m not hangin with anybody who’s doing stupid shit, ya know? How you think I got here? You hurt me with my own sista, but then you’re gonna question me about John? “Fuck no.” I’m not gonna be played for a fool! I ain’t the one. I’m not some stupid white bitch. I also am not gonna depend on a man to support me.
I’m going to college and I’m being the doctor that I always wanted to be. And no man is gonna bring me down w/ their problems or whatever childish games they wanna play… ya feel me? I will support myself only! Anyway, I have no time for secrets either. You always gotta sneak phone calls to talk to me and you always gotta sneak to see me too. And I’m not down w/ all that. It would just be better to be with me when you move out of your mom’s house. Ya feel me? I’m just trying to make you understand where I’m coming from. If you don’t then there’s no hope for us in the future. I also need a man that can take care of himself and has their mind on their goals in life. And one of their goals has to be their future. B/c I don’t wanna bunch of problems on my shoulders anymore. Ya feel me? I hope so….
Well, how’s life with you? My mom’s o.k. She’s getting out on March 28, 1998. I’m getting out on April 1st or 2nd! B/c it’s “hell” here. They treat me like I’m a dog. I’m going to court soon and I have a feeling I’m going home. So I’m happy.
Why when you write me, you don’t write me long letters? I be writing you long letters.
Well, anyways I’m getting a car on June 18, 1998 (my b-day). And I’m gonna be getting an apt. [apartment] too. (My mom’s helping me). Well, I have my life and my mind straight, I know that much. You should stop making all these bad choices you’re making, o.k.? Your life will be much better if you did. Well, look I’m gonna
d
r
o
p
a few lines and say I still do care about you and I [heart] you. O.k.? Just think about what I told you. I got to go. W/B/S/
[Heart] always,
Brittany
Rochelle
[Last Name]
P.S.
Be Good
I hope that Brittany is happy wherever she is right now. She seems like she had a good head on her shoulders even though she was having issues in her life at the time she wrote this letter. I hope she never gave that cheater Herb another chance (he didn’t even write her long letters trying to get back!). I hope that she went to college and became a doctor. And I hope that she found a man that makes good life choices.
